Monday, April 27, 2009

Chicago Is Overweight

The Dude Abides 
With the Jays up 4-3 in the top of the 9th against Bobby Jenks, Rios is fouling off pitches and working an 0-2 count. One of his foul balls makes its way down the third base line where two large women have fallen over and struggle to get back into their seats. Ginger and Darrin discuss accordingly. 

Sunday, April 26, 2009

A Ringing Endorsement

Fuck Off, Ginger Campbell
Ginger Campbell pretty much gives up on the Blue Jays being able to hit and Darren has to shut him the fuck up. He should have just punched him in the face. I'm not being an optimistic moron here, I know they can't keep it up, but Ginger should know better than to doubt the hitting power of the 2009 Toronto Blue Jays.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

The Winds Of Shit

This Shit Is Bananas
Ginger Campbell was joined at the helm by Darrin Fletcher, who provided viewers with insight on what it's like to be hit by a ball as a catcher after Carlos Quentin's foul tip hit Rod Barajas in the shoulder. The explanation used by Fletcher appears to have confused Campbell, who at the end seems to get lost in the example. It could also be very easy for a very simple minded writer to comment on how Ginger appears to enjoy black bananas for their "ripeness", but I like to pride myself on being better than that.

Bad Case Of Gingervitis
Fletcher and Ginger get together later in the game to provide harrowing insight on how much Brian Murphy looks like the injured Jesse Litsche. Now, I for one agree all gingers look the same, so good on Fletcher to bring it to the attention of everyone listening, especially those in retirement homes across Canada. I also understand the need for Ginger Campbell to come to the aide of his ginger brothers in his "fair skinned" conclusion. I don't think describing them as "disgusting, inhuman, inherently dumb, have no souls, and are unable to survive in the sunlight" would have gone over quite as well.

There's Something About Corky
Even though I had to shorten this clip you'll still notice the unbelieveable amount of time that passes as Ginger appears to be reading the shit out of Corky Miller's Wikipedia page. For those who may notice, Ginger's enthusastic introduction of Corky actually comes before Fletcher's comparison of Murphy and Litsche, but I made it nice and tidy, so we could all understand the essence of how fucking horrific it is when Campbell does, what I suppose could be considered colour commentary. I don't think I've ever heard Ginger Campbell be so clearly upset by a single GIDP by the Jays or RISP the Jays have stranded as much as I hear in this clip. Fuck you, Ginger Campbell.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Severe Acute Downs Syndome

O Fuck Off
Ginger Campbell reviews the day that Darren O'Day had as he debuts for the Texas Rangers the previous night. For those who don't remember, he was wearing Kason Gabbard's jersey because they weren't able to get O'Day's jersey ready in time for the game. Ginger gives us some additional details and Rance gives us his best impression of not giving a fuck about anything Ginger has to say.

The Death Of Wit
In his first game as closer for an injured Ryan, Downs has a 2-2 count on Taylor Teagarden. Toronto has a 5-2 lead and Downs has already recorded one out. Here is Ginger's commentary as Teagarden watches strike three.